Courage
What does it mean to have courage?
- Courage can be defined as saying or doing what you believe is correct in spite of the consequences or potential push back one may receive.
- Woodard and Pury define courage as “the voluntary willingness to act, with or without varying levels of fear, in response to a threat to achieve an important, perhaps moral, outcome or goal” (Rate et al., 2007)
- Courage as the will to accomplish one’s goals despite external or internal opposition through the character strengths of bravery, persistence, integrity, and zest (Peterson & Seligman, 2004)
What does the science say about developing courage?
- Courage operates on a spectrum: the middle path between fear (or fearfulness) and fearlessness (or recklessness; Aristotle).
- Psychological tools that help youth build courage
- Teaching them how to face their fears through self-talk
- Cognitive reappraisal: Being able to self-reflect on one’s emotions and thoughts in a difficult situation helps to reframe the situation and downregulate negative emotions and thoughts–in order to overcome risk and act courageously
- Don’t bubble-wrap and constantly rescue youth
- Greater autonomy support: helping youth take risks and think through them rather helicopter mentoring/parenting
- Set the expectations to be courageous
- Youth are more courageous when they believe adults expect them to be courageous
- Build their confidence
- Help them know their worth, and build their self-esteem and self-efficacy
- Teaching them how to face their fears through self-talk
What does Allah and His Prophet(s) say about having courage?
Courage in the face of calamity or danger
Quran
- We will certainly test you with some fear and hunger, and some loss of possessions and lives and crops. But give good news to the steadfast. Those who, when a calamity afflicts them, say, “To God we belong, and to Him we will return.” (2:155-156)
- O my son, observe the prayer, advocate righteousness, forbid evil, and be patient over what has befallen you. These are of the most honorable traits. (31:17)
Hadith
- “The strong believer is better and more loved by Allah, the Almighty, than the weak one, and there is good in both. Keenly pursue what benefits you, seek Help from Allah and do not lose hope. If something befalls you, do not say “if only I had done such and such,” for “if only” opens the door to the shaitan.” (Muslim) (Note: this hadith is not referring to physical strength alone but to determination and perseverance.)
- “Courage in Islam refers to steadfastness in the heart at the time of danger.” (Tahdhib Al-Lughah (1/214); Lisan Al-‘Arab 8/173)
- Ali reported: When the danger intensified and the people met each other in battle, we would seek protection by the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him. None of us would be closer to the enemy than him. (Musnad Aḥmad 1347)
- Anas reported: The people of Medina were frightened by a noise one night, and some came out of their homes in the direction of the sound. They were met by the Prophet returning, as he had preceded them to where the sound came from. The Prophet was riding on the horse of Abu Talhah without a saddle and a sword around his neck, saying, “Do not be afraid! Do not be afraid!” (Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 2820, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2307)
Moral Courage
Quran
- …So do not fear people, but fear Me. And do not sell My revelations for a cheap price. Those who do not rule according to what God revealed are the unbelievers (5:44)
- O you who believe! Be patient, and advocate patience, and be united, and revere God, so that you may thrive. (3:200)
Hadith
- Ali reported: When the weapon of the Prophet(s) had been assembled, I found on the handle or blade of his sword three sayings, “Maintain relations with those who cut you off, speak the truth even if it is against yourself, and be good to one who is evil to you.” (Mu’jam Ibn al-A’rābī 1507)
- The Prophet(s) said, “Let not fear of the people stop one of you from speaking the truth, if he knows it.” (Musnad Aḥmad 11869)
- Tariq ibn Shihab reported: A man asked the Prophet(s) while he had his leg in the stirrup, “Which jihad is best?” The Prophet said, “A word of truth before a tyrannical ruler.” (Sunan al-Nasā’ī 4209)
- Courage in the face of calamity or danger
- Courage of Asiya – wife of Firaun
- Asiya openly expressed her belief in Allah (T) even in the presence of her husband, Pharaoh, who was a powerful and tyrannical ruler. Asiya endured physical torture and emotional abuse at the hands of Pharaoh and his followers. This required immense bravery as she knew the consequences of her actions.
- Courage of the Prophet’s companions.
- Umm Umarah was a brave warrior who tirelessly fought alongside the Prophet Muhammad(S) in numerous battles. She displayed exceptional courage and bravery on the battlefield, and was renowned for her skill in tending to the wounded. Her unwavering support and dedication to the cause of Islam made her a respected and admired figure among the early Muslim community.
- What Aida of Palestine can teach us about courage
- The people of Palestine are demonstrating continuous courage by not forsaking Allah (T) and Islam even after the genocide and continuous torture.
- How brave was Muhammad (S)
- Prophet (S) was always on the front lines and always took the hardships with his people, never allowing someone else to struggle when he was not struggling. People would hover around the Prophet (S) on the battlefield when the war is going very difficult.
- Courage of Asiya – wife of Firaun
- Moral Courage
- Malcolm X’s moral courage:
- Malcolm X is the first political leader to voice support and awareness of the attacks on Palestine and would support Yuri Kochiyama in her justice after the nuclear bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
- Reflections on Muhammad Ali / Muhammad Ali, a life of bravery
- Muhammad Ali spoke against the racial injustice and refused to be drafted into the Vietnam War, even going all the way to the Supreme Court, in which he won.
- The Prophet(S)’s courage at Taif
- Prophet (SAW) not willing to let Angel Jibril to squash the people of Taif. Despite facing immense rejection and physical harm from the people of Taif, the Prophet (SAW) maintained his moral integrity and refused to resort to violence. This shows his unwavering commitment to his mission and his belief in the principles of justice and compassion.
- Prophetic Model of Courage and the Belief Model
- The Belief model is framework developed by the Productive Muslim that assists in developing a higher level of spiritual confidence.
- Owning Mistakes- Ka’ab ibn Malik
- Ka’ab Ibn Malik’s story teaches youth valuable lessons about having the courage to own up to one’s mistake, seek forgiveness and earn vindication.
- Malcolm X’s moral courage:
- Have you Ever?
- Youth will be introduced to the concepts of courage and vulnerability and practice these concepts by sharing traits that make them special and unique.
- Refer to the linked document for the steps of the activities and discussion questions.
- 10 ways to practice being bold
- Ten practical exercises to help your youth grow their courage muscles.
- Building a courageous culture for your youth groups/classrooms
- This courage mapping team-building activity encourages individual reflection, fosters open communication within teams and identifies and reinforces shared values. Can be adapted for teens.
- Courage Bingo
- Have each youth create their own personal courage bingo: teens would write challenges on the bingo card that are difficult for them, include their fears, and can range from easy to difficult
- Each time youth complete an activity, they mark it off the card. Once they hit bingo, reward them with something special.
- It’s all in the mind
- Help youth understand that fear lives in the mind and can be reframed so that one can act courageously.
- Reflect on Ibn Al-Qayyim’s saying
- Ibn Al-Qayyim said, “Courage comes from the heart; it is steadfastness and calm at times of fear. It is a characteristic that results from patience and positive thinking, for when a person thinks that he can overcome trouble and has patience to help him, he will remain steadfast. By the same token, cowardice results from negative thinking and impatience, which makes a person think that he cannot overcome the problem and he does not have patience to keep him calm. The origin of cowardice is negative thinking and thinking that the worst will happen…” (Ar-Ruh p. 236) (Source)
- Write on cards the thoughts that come up when one feels afraid. Put sticky notes on a wall poster on one side.
- On the other side of the poster, write how the statement can be reworded to help youth be courageous.
- Reflect on Ibn Al-Qayyim’s saying
- Help youth understand that fear lives in the mind and can be reframed so that one can act courageously.
- Role-Playing Difficult Conversations
- Role playing with youth on how to speak with parents about difficult topics. Examples:
- When someone has a crush or potential marriage interest, how do we go about managing it?
- Changing college career tracks
- Hanging out at a friend’s party
- Role playing with youth on how to speak with parents about difficult topics. Examples:
- Workshops for high school students on healthy communication (active listening, sharing feelings, being vulnerable, etc)
- Other activities to develop courage
- Teaching new skills (first aid, swimming, knots, horseback riding, archery, etc)
- Witnessing qurbani
- Opportunities to express courage (trying new foods, etc) – putting out exotic vegetables or fruits during youth events
- Participating Social Justice projects (letters, protests, encampments, sharing posts on social media, etc)
- Handing out flyers at the masjid/fundraiser; finding opportunities to interact with people they don’t know
- Oh Allah! Grant me the strength to oppose myself, the courage to face my weakness, the conviction to accept my faith, the satisfaction to relax my mind, and the understanding to reassure my heart. (Dua)
- O Allah, I take refuge in you from anxiety and sorrow, weakness and laziness, miserliness and cowardice, the burden of debts and from being overpowered by men. (Hisn al-Muslim 121)
- To You, my Lord, I complain of my weakness, lack of support and the humiliation I am made to receive. Most Compassionate and Merciful! You are the Lord of the weak, and you are my Lord. (Dua)
- Oh Allah conceal my faults and calm my fears. (Sunan Ibn Majah 3871)
- There’s this woman Bronnie Ware, who was a palliative care nurse for many years. Through this, she learned that the #1 regret of people who are dying is: “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” What’s holding you back to living a life true to yourself?
- What is the relationship between courage and fear?
- What daily activities do you need courage for?
- When you think about chasing your dreams, what holds you back?
- What are you most afraid of?
- What does courage look like for you at this moment?
Cited Sources and Additional Resources:
- https://www.abuaminaelias.com/dailyhadithonline/tag/courage-al-shajjaah/
- Source for most dua: https://www.islamicreliefcanada.org/resources/duas-and-dhikr
- Building self-esteem in teens. (Source: https://www.momjunction.com/articles/amazing-activities-to-improve-of-your-teenager-self-esteem_00114754/)