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In the Meantime: 10 step guide to embracing singlehood

Just emerging from sujood, I whispered the last remnants of my constant dua of “Oh Allah, you hold the key to the heavens and the Earth. Please bless me with those things that are best for me and remove those things that will take me from you. Please bless me with a loving and kind, Muslim husband. Someone who loves me but loves You more.” I was greeted by a woman beckoning an answer to her incessant question of “when you getting married?” I glanced up at her eyes that were hungry for an answer that I did not possess myself. “Allahu alim auntie”, I replied as I stood up. Straightening the pleats in my skirt, I went off in search of my shoes. I was meeting my father for lunch. Therefore, I could not afford the time (nor energy) to divulge the details of marriage possibilities rooted in mutual love and adoration, but just were not “The One.” She screamed, “Give your ummi my salaams!” As the mosque doors closed behind me, I thought “Hmmm, good luck with that”. Interestingly, I had no clue of her name or why she was so invested in a wedding she would not be invited to anyway.

Upon meeting dad, he held the door open for me leading into our favorite restaurant as he has done for 31 years. After taking our order, the owner who is an old friend of dad began to inquire about our family. He looked to me with a huge smile on his face and asked about my husband and children. I smiled and replied that I was not yet married and did not have any children. After his initial look of embarrassment, he began with one of the most beautiful statements I pray I never forget. “Know that your husband exists and he is a great man. I know because Allah (swt) created you from him.” Subhanullah, those words were what I needed to hear. They were the answer to my everyday dua.

In the meantime, I discovered 10 things about enjoying the here and now of singlehood … in preparation for marriage.

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Zakat eligibility of The FYI

The Family & Youth Institute, or The FYI, is a well-known Muslim organization in the United States. It works to promote mental health and wellness by strengthening and empowering individuals, families, and communities through research and education. It has been working for many years to bring Islamic perspectives to understanding and promoting mental health in our communities.

It is dedicated to serving and supporting Muslims – safeguarding our deen, our families, and our future generations. Therefore, the work of The FYI comes in the category of ‘fi sabeelillah’ or the Path of Allah, within the eight categories where Zakat money can be used.

Zakah expenditures are only for the poor and for the needy and for those employed for it and for bringing hearts together [for Islam] and for freeing captives [or slaves] and for those in debt and for the cause of Allah, and for the [stranded] traveler – an obligation [imposed] by Allah, And Allah, is Knowing and Wise.”
(Al-Tawbah 9:60)

According to scholars who widen the meaning of fee sabeelillah to include any activities that promote Islamic growth, The FYI is indeed eligible to receive part of the Zakat funds for its programs and services. I urge Muslims in America to support this organization through their donations, general charity, and through their Zakat. I ask Allah swt to strengthen and guide The FYI to continue its good work in supporting Muslims.

Shaikh Ali Suleiman Ali, PhD

About Shaikh Ali

Sh. Ali Suleiman Ali was born in Ghana where he spent his childhood studying with various Muslim scholars. He then moved to Saudi Arabia and enrolled in the Islamic University of Madina.  He graduated with a degree in both Arabic and Islamic Studies. Dr. Ali went on to complete his Ph.D. in Islamic Studies at the University of Michigan, Ann Arbor.

Sh. Ali serves on the Advisory Council of The Family & Youth Institute. He is the Senior Imam and Director of the Muslim Community of Western Suburbs in Canton, Michigan. Additionally, he serves as the Director of Muslim Family Services in Detroit and is a council member of the Fiqh Council of North America (FCNA). He is also a member of the North American Imams Federation (NAIF) and the Association of Muslim Jurists of America (AMJA).