Your support during difficult times can mean the world to a friend or family member who is going through a divorce. It’s important to know what not to say to someone going through a divorce and why not to say it as you try to find the words to comfort those you love. Check out the resources below. For more resources, check out The FYI’s Divorce Support Toolkit.
General Divorce Support Resources
- Learn how to comfort appropriately
- How to support a friend
- 21 ways to show up for and support a friend going through divorce
If you are married to or marrying a divorcee, use these resources:
- Consider pros and cons that may exist in being with someone who is divorced
- Create healthy a interpersonal communication style using these 10 rules
- Recognize that your spouse may be triggered by trauma from his/her previous marriage and learn how to cope with it
- Conflict in your relationship can be triggering for your partner–accept that it’s a normal part of a relationship that can be managed
- Your partner may be experiencing mistrust – read this to learn more about what they may be feeling
- Emotionally attune to your partner
If your spouse is a survivor of abuse, use these resources:
- Help your partner heal from relationship abuse
- Try these 10 suggestions for partners of survivors
- Consider these bill of rights for survivors of domestic violence and what they hope to expect from you in this new relationship
Responding to Abuse – Resources for family members, friends and community leaders
- Respond with RAHMA when someone discloses abuse to you
- Acknowledge that men experience abuse too and need support
- Do not engage in victim-blaming which places the victim in greater danger and decreases the chance that he/she will reach out for help in the future:
- “She must have provoked him” and other examples of victim blaming – know what it looks like
- Understand why victim-blaming is so common
- Here are 5 things you can do to support survivors of sexual assault
- Here is what you should do if you encounter domestic violence
- Understand why domestic violence victims don’t leave
Resources for Reducing Stigma around Domestic Violence
- Educate yourself on the reality of domestic violence in the Muslim community and share this with others
- Listen to Muslim survivors of domestic violence
- Read and share stories about the unique challenges that immigrant Muslim women and African American Muslim women face
- Consider these 15 actions you can take as a religious or community leader about domestic violence
- Educate yourself on the Islamic Marriage Contract using this guide created by Faith Trust Institute.
